It’s a Girl!

My sweet Tinslee,

Mommy called the doctor for a whole week straight trying to find out if you were a girl or a boy. I probably annoyed them so bad! One morning, I called them and they said, “Your lab work is in. Would you like to know if its a girl or a boy?” I said, “YES!” When the words came out of the nurses mouth that you are a little baby girl, my world paused. All I could do with smile and cry. Your daddy was right beside me and I wish you could’ve saw the smile on his face. In all 7 years of being with him, I’ve never saw his face so lit up. After we found out and mommy stopped crying (happy tears), we called your Mimi and Grammie. They are very excited to meet you. I am so happy that you are a girl.

We are telling people that we are pregnant on Thanksgiving! That is only 3 days away! We are excited to let the secret out. Right now, mommy is 14 weeks pregnant. That means mommy is going to start showing soon!!!! I can’t wait to see my little baby bump and show you off! I can’t wait to start feeling your little kicks and flutters, so when you’re ready, give me a kick. lol. Also, we are excited for you to meet our other little baby… Callee. She is an Australian Shepard. I told her about you and she is excited to meet you. She lays on my belly sometimes and tries to see if she can hear you in there.

My goal is to be the best mommy to you that I possibly can. If there is one thing that I want you to know and always remember, it would be that you are good enough. Be yourself. People in this world are going to try to put you down and sometimes you’re going to feel like your not pretty enough, or thin enough, or have the best clothes, or your makeup doesn’t look good enough, but you are beautiful! You rock the cute clothes you wear! And you don’t even need makeup, so how could your makeup ever look bad? It couldn’t. You are beautifully and wonderfully made. You are perfect in mine and your daddy’s eyes and that will never change. We love you.

You are such a perfect gift from God. I will probably annoy you by constantly telling you I love, but I can’t stop saying it. Mommy loves you to death!

October 8, 2015

Dear little precious gift from God,

Today was mommy’s first ultrasound. Guess what!!!! I got to see you. I was so nervous and excited. I cried when I saw you. Two little tears came out of my eyes and I had to hold back the rest of them so the doctors didn’t think I was insane. You are so beautiful and I love you so much already. I saw your little heart fluttering today. It looked just like a butterfly. I have never smiled so big or been so happy in my life! You are already my world. Your daddy is really nervous. I think he’s worried about being a daddy. He wants to be the best daddy to you. He smiled ear to ear when he saw you, baby. He loves you. When we got in the car, he was talking about how excited he is. Seeing you was amazing. I cannot wait to see you again and hear your heart beating inside of me. I love you. I cannot express how much I love you. I can’t wait to meet you. I cannot wait to know if you are a boy or a girl. I’m so ready to find out and start buying things for you. Me and your daddy are going to spoil you. We are going to give you the best life that we can. We promise! We are telling your Mimi, Papa, Grammie, Mammaw, uncle, and aunt tomorrow. We are nervous about telling them! We know they are going to love you so much! You are going to have young parents, baby, so bear with us while we try to do the best that we can. Everything we do, will be for you. I love you more than life. More than anything. I love you to the moon and back… really, really slow.

❤ Your mommy and your daddy!

more than a number

I wake up and head to the bathroom in a zombie- like state. The first thing I do is look in the mirror. I raise my shirt up, exposing my waist. I pinch and poke my stomach, comparing today to yesterday. Next, I slip of my clothes and step on the bathroom scale. I watch the numbers dance across the screen and I hear myself hold my breath. I could lie to you. I could tell you I don’t do this every single morning. I could tell you I don’t beat myself up for having a cookie or three. I could tell you I don’t notice if when I sit down, my thighs touch. I could tell you all these things, but I wouldn’t be being honest with you or myself. I pride myself with being honest, even if it isn’t always easy. Ernest Hemingway once said, “write clear and hard about what hurts.” This quote ran through my mind as I bounced around the idea of this brutally honest post. It saddens me to know I am not the only young woman obsessed with counting calories, pushing the extra mile, and acting like my body issues aren’t happening. This is real. We ar entering ourselves down. We are constantly comparing ourselves to others. So, ladies what I’m saying to you is this: it is perfectly fine to maintain a healthy diet and exercise, but don’t lose yourself in the process. You are more than numbers on a scale. Love yourself and encourage other young women to do the same.

August 27, 2014- The day that changed my life.

Dana,

You posted a video on August 27, 2014 that changed my life. Confidence has always been a very touchy subject for me. I’ve never felt fully confident in myself. Before seeing this video, I looked in the mirror and always pointed out my imperfections… my scars… my flat chest… I have struggles with this throughout middle, high school, and college. My biggest issue was having NO boobs. I would be ashamed to look in the mirror after I got out of the shower or to even be intimate with my fiancé. I thought I had to wear push- up bras, even to the gym. Gross, right? This hurt me in so many ways. You went on to talk about people struggling with eating disorders. Right when I heard the two words “Eating Disorder,” I busted into tears, while sitting with my fiancé. I had never told anyone until this day. The words you spoke made me realize it was okay. It was okay to to finally tell someone. And let me tell you, getting this out made me feel GOOD! Being “skinny” was never enough for me. I wanted to be skinnier. I had an image in my head that I wanted to add up to. You made me realize no one should have to go through this alone. Thank you, Dana Linn Bailey, for making me understand my imperfections make me who I am. That day, it “clicked.” From just your words in a 5 min video, I had confidence. As crazy as that seems, it is so true. Thank you for this video. Thank you for inspiring me to work hard and chase my dreams. I am sharing this story with you because I am so inspired by you. You and Rob have pushed me to my limits. Rob, you made me realize my worth. You made me realize what I deserve in a man. You made me realize that I should not settle. Thank you.  I’ve grown so much because of you two… physically, mentally, and emotionally. Flag Nor Fail is like a family to me.

Sincerely,

Tiffani Wells

Be proud of who you are.

Confidence. It comes from comfortabilty with yourself.  There was a time when I wasn’t comfortable with myself. I wasn’t comfortable dressing myself.Having muscles before not having muscles was easy, I could fit into all my shirts. It was really hard. One year ago something clicked. My biggest issue was my femininity. I saw all these girls in dresses, with a chest. I’m flat as a board. I questioned myself. Should I get beat implants? Thankfully, I have a finance who said Fuck No. You need that. you need that supportive person behind you. Not everyone has that support system that completely backs them so then they start making decisions based off someone else’s opinion instead of trust their own. I cant even name what switched in my head but something switched. I just became comfortable with every aspect of how I look. I loved my body. And once you get that feeling, its like really powerful. It’s a really cool feeling to be completely confident with exactly who you are. It feels really good.

Everyone goes through this at some point in your life. Your body image is really hard for everybody. Maybe at sometime your struggling with your weight, have eating disorders growing up, your too skinny, bur once you actually find that something….I wish I could just bottle it up and give it to everybody because once you have that confidence it feels really good.

Confidence is the key. Don’t let anyone take that confidence from you.

What I want in a relationship/ my future husband…

1.) Someone that lifts me up… By that I mean someone that calls me pretty. Some one that encourages me to go after my fitness goals and dreams. Someone that buys me flowers “just because”. Someone that wants to do sweet things for me, simply because they care.

2.) Someone that reflects Jesus Christ. I feel like a relationship based off God is the best kind of love there is. What could be better than being a couple with values, the same beliefs, and having something to support you through temptation? Nothing could be better than that.

3.) Someone that makes me feel special. Someone that really makes me feel special. How else could I put it? It’s simple. Feeling special makes you feel like you’re on top of the world, gives you confidence, and makes your love stronger.

4.) Someone that is truthful, always. A relationship that is based off of lies is no relationship at all. I want someone that can always tell me the truth, no matter how bad it hurts or how difficult it could be. I would have much more respect for someone that tells me the truth rather than find it out from other people (a week, month, or even a year later).

5.) Someone that is faithful. I want a guy that thinks I’m the most beautiful girl in the world… Over any celebrity, model, etc… No fantasies. I want someone that looks at me like his princess… like his supermodel (even when I’m old and have wrinkles). Someone who doesn’t watch porn. Someone that would never look at another girl with lust in his eyes. Drink with other girls. Or put himself in situations where things could get tempting.

6.) Someone who helps me. A guy that helps me clean house. Helps me wash dishes. Helps me with school. Someone that is happy to help me. A guy that does chores without me asking, begging, or bitching. It would be nice to put my feet up sometimes and not have to worry about cleaning, cooking, or doing dishes. At least one day.

7.) Someone that accepts me for me… accepts my flaws. Someone that thinks my flaws make me perfectly imperfect.

8.) Someone that wants to have a family. A guy that loves kids and loves my love for children. A guy that wants to start a family with me. Someone ready to take that chance.

9.) Someone that won’t betray me no matter the situation. When he’s put on the spot. When he is pressured. He will think of me. During situations that he’s put on the spot, he will remember the sweet love we share.

10) A guy that will always have my back. Always love me, hold me, and simply be my shoulder to cry on in hard times. Someone that cherishes our love. Loves our love. Loves our laughs, our smiles, and every second we spend together. Treat it as if it’s our last. Someone’s who’s everyday actions reflect their love for me.

give me a chance

Give me a chance to say what i can.

Cause I can’t sleep when I can’t see you, I can’t be myself.

All I wanna do, is get back to you.

In your tight white t’s, your faded jeans.

Your eyes are so blue. Ish green. Green. Ish gold.

All you pretend to see is all you want me to be.

I’m the girl who sees you.

And I’m the girl who wants you to want her, too.

All I wanna do, is get back to you.

In your tight white t’s, your faded jeans.

Your eyes are so blue. Ish green. Green. Ish gold.

promises

You are so beautiful. You are so wonderful. God knew the desires of my heart when he brought me to you.

I am the most blessed in the world to have a love like you.

I’ll stand by your side till’ our days on the earth are through, I promise you.

You are incredible. You’re unforgettable, baby.

I’m so caught up in your eyes.

I love you, I love you.

I can see us growing old together. You will be my one and only treasure.

Our love can conquer all, I promise you.

You are so cool. You are my . It ain’t easy loving’ you, but I’ll never stop.

I promise you.

When we’re old and grey and rocking’ on the porch together.

I’ll look at you and say my life can’t get much better.

Do you remember the day I could see us growing old together.

You have been my one and only treasure.

Though my hairs are grey and my teeth sit in a cup.

My love for you is beyond anything I’ve ever felt.

Our love has conquered all, I promise you.

I promise you. To be your best friend.

I promise you. Till’ the very end.

love to love

For others to love us in a healthy way, we have to be able to take care of ourselves, to love and honor who we are. Decide to treat others with love and respect: As you seek to bring joy into others’ lives you’ll find that they repay you with kindness and love. Let go of the past: What happened in the past is history now. Today is a new day, and you are starting a new page. Let go of disappointments, hurts and any grievances you hold against yourself, other people – or the world! Forgive yourself: We all make mistakes, or we regret some bad decisions. Don’t criticise yourself for that. Instead, forgive whatever happened, and give yourself a break. It simply means you’re human. We want to be a constant reminder of the love & worth that every single human deserves. You, my dear, are worthy of love.